5 Reasons Young Adults Leave Church

1. We tell Young Adults what they should think

Young adults need to think through difficult issues, not be spoon fed the answers. If you want young adults to flee your church, I encourage you to not allow them to process their feelings, but to rather tell them exactly how they should think and feel about what concerns them. If you really want them to never come back, let them know that how they feel is wrong and unbiblical. You may even want to throw an out of context Bible verse at them…they really hate that.

2. We are unprepared to handle deep theological discussions

Young adults are often interested in discussing the complexities of our faith, especially those who have at least a bit of a background in church. They are hungry for spiritual transformation, not behavioral modification. The church needs to move away from just talking through concrete and behavioral issues and move toward abstract issues in Scripture. Instead of challenging the way they behave, we must challenge the way they think. They really want to know why many of their friends who have "behaved" correctly still suffer. Or why their heads are full of rules, but no real relationship with God. If we leave them in this place of confusing, they will disconnect from the church.

3. We have an agenda

One of the best ways to get young adults out of your church is to meet with them while having an agenda. Young adults are very perceptive so you don’t even need to be obvious about this. If the only time we call that great 23 year old guitar player is to ask him to play on the worship team Sunday morning, we have an agenda. Young adults are talented, creative, and can be hard workers. However, if we only see them for they can do for the church, we have an agenda. We must get to know them for who they are, not just what they can do.

4. We are dishonest

Young adults place a high value on honesty and bluntness. They will know you love them when you can gracefully be straight forward and honest with them. If you want to completely fail with young adults, I strongly encourage you to be unwilling to have difficult and honest conversations with them. They need and want someone to be straight forward with them about their spiritual journey. If you are reluctant to go down that road with them in a loving, yet confrontational way, they will feel unchallenged and unloved.

5. We are uneducated and disinterested about social issues

Young adults want to make a difference in this world and want to make a difference now. They know about the pain and suffering taking place in this world and truly believe that they can do something about it. If your church is doing nothing about poverty, human trafficking, orphans, widows, and other social issues…your church is completely irrelevant. A young adult couldn’t care less about a church that doesn’t care. While you complain about young adults leaving, they are giving their time to help restore the broken things in this world.